Undecided love
by Logan-e
Summary: An accident is a new opening for Lizzie, in her life and love. Jonathan/Lizzie/Bill
1. unusual picture

Undecided Love

**Undecided Love**

An accident is a new opening for Lizzie in her life and love. Jonathan/Lizzie/Bill

**I'm having Billy in this one too; I liked the "father/daughter" type relationship between them. Please don't be confused at the beginning, this story starts after the part where Lizzie leaves to see Sarah for mother's day, but she and Bill are still together. **

Chapter one: Unusual sight

She felt little again, small, fragile, and lonely. She was seeing what she wanted too see in remembrance of drawing of her own perfect world. Blue grass, orange and yellow flowers, a pink sky with red hearts that acted as clouds. That world was one of happiness for Lizzie Spaulding, but now everything was starting to fade away.

The sound of Uncle Rick calming Beth, Alan and Billy arguing over who get's too see her first, the sweet scent of Grandma Lillian's perfume, and another fight between Jonathan and Bill. Now she was realizing she had people in her life that cared about her, but sometimes none of it made anything better. The two people in her life that she would drop everything for, was what made her life chaotic.

The card Reva had given her, just made her day, first thinking that Jonathan was thinking about her, and would not let Sara not know her mom. After getting the hint from Reva, Lizzie wasted no time.

"_WHOA, Lizzie slow down what are you doing, more importantly where are you going?" Bill intensely stared at Lizzie as rushed to pack an over night suit case._

"_I'm going to see Sarah and Jonathan."_

_Bill was dumbstruck_

"_Lizzie…"_

"_Don't look at me like that Bill. Reva gave me mothers day card from Sarah, with an address… Granddad is at low point in life right now, but I'm not, I need to see my daughter."_

"_Lizzie let me come with you"_

"_You don't know how much I want you to come, but if you come then Jonathan might not come back."_

"_What do you mean, 'Jonathan might not come back'?"_

"_Did you not hear what I just said; Granddad is at a low point, no money, no business, and no more mansion. There is nothing he can do to Jonathan now…"_

_Normally Bill would have argued Lizzie's case, but it was because of him and Dinah that Alan is at his low point. He did most of that so he could be with Lizzie. Her daughter was one the many things that made her happy, and whatever makes her happy, makes himself happy, but he did not trust Jonathan._

"_If I can convince Jonathan of that… all's I know is that I need my daughter, and I'll do anything for that."_

"_Yeah, Lizzie, but do you really think that you can get Jonathan to come back, you're probably going to need Reva--"_

"_Reva should be talking to him right now."_

"_In person?"_

"_No Bill, over the phone… OF COURSE in person, he won't exactly be welcoming me with open arms."_

"_Well if Reva gets too go, then I get too go too." Bill was acting like a five year old kid._

"_No Bill because, not only is do I need Sarah, but I need you. We both now that if you and Jonathan don't get along, and I need someone too come back home too." _

_The thought made Bill smile happily. Lizzie zipped her suit case shut, and made her way too Bill._

"_I love you Bill!" Lizzie was going to give Bill a hug, but instead he captured her into a kiss, a very passionate kiss, lasting longer that most of his past kisses with Lizzie._

"_WOW! See now that is something to come home too."_

_Bill smiled yet again, as Lizzie went to grab her suit case; she was not even out the door, but he could not wait for her too get back._

**Well next chapter, we see Lizzie reunite with Jonathan and Sarah. Please leave a review, and I'll post a new chapter soon. Thanks.**

**Logan-e**


	2. chances

Thanks for the reviews here is chapter two

* * *

Lizzie walked the steps inside of the apartment complex that Jonathan and Sarah resided at. She reached the door, slowly setting her suit-case and shopping bags to the floor. She went to knock on the door but stopped, turned away and the first thing she saw was Reva's car in the parking lot.

"_Reva has your back, Jonathan won't say no too Reva."_

Lizzie turned back around and immediately knocked on the door. Lizzie heard faint voices from inside, noisy movement, and finally the sound of the door being unlocked and opening.

"Lizzie, Lizzie what are you doing here?"

"Well… Well…"

Lizzie grabbed her shopping bags off the floor

"I brought stuff… stuff for both you and Sarah."

"Lizzie."

"Um, and I wanted to thank you for the mothers day card."

"Liz—"

"Is that all you can say Jonathan, I did not come out here for nothing, didn't Reva tell you."

Jonathan looked back inside his apartment where Reva was holding Sarah

"Tell me what Reva?"

"Jonathan I figured I'd let Lizzie tell you this, you at least owe her that, to listen to her."

"Tell me what?"

"Well can I come in, and see Sarah please."

The look is Lizzie's eyes were just burning into Jonathan's brain. It was like she was staring into her own world, but also begging and pleading, seconds away from falling to floor to beg, and moments before tears.

"Jonathan please!" yep she was going to start crying. Jonathan was not completely heartless; he hated seeing the women in his life cry.

"Ok, how bout I help you with your stuff."

Jonathan grabbed Lizzie's suitcase as she grouped together her shopping bags and entered Jonathan's apartment. Lizzie dropped her bags again once she saw Sarah. Reva met Lizzie half way and handed the infant over too her mom.

"There has never been a time to stop a Spaulding." Jonathan quietly stated the obvious.

Jonathan let Lizzie have a moment to rejoice with Sarah

"Jonathan take a look at the clothes, they are going to look so cute with Sarah; good thing I got a bigger memory card for my camera…"

Reva was babbling on as she looked through Lizzie's shopping bags, Jonathan kept his focus on Lizzie and Sarah, with thoughts of what Lizzie and Reva would tell him.

"Jonathan look at this."

Jonathan took a quick look at Reva, then back to Lizzie.

"Jonathan your doing a good thing, the mother's day card was a good thing."

Reva stuffed the pink outfit into the bag, and made Jonathan focus his attention to her.

"I don't think I can ever trust Lizzie again, I've done it over and over."

"Jonathan, everyone makes mistakes in their life, it's how we live, and Lizzie will do anything for Sarah, the same goes for you, but why can't she have both of her parents in her life to do everything?"

Sometimes Jonathan hated it when Reva was right, but as much as hate he had for Lizzie, his daughter still needs a mother. They say third times a charm, he did not believe in stuff like that, especially when it came to his life.

"_One more chance Lizzie."_

**Ok, sorry for the shortness, the next chapter should be longer that chap's one and two combined. Please leave a review, and the next chapter Lizzie tells Jonathan of Alan's downfall. Ok I know, whatever, Dinah took down Alan, such a big reveal but, that's not all that is in the next chapter.**

Logan-e


	3. jealousy

Thanks for the reviews, here is chapter three

* * *

Jonathan watched for a few minutes as Lizzie held Sarah, though he was starting to get very anxious toward what Lizzie was going to tell him.

"So Lizzie, why did you come here exactly, you know it's not sa—"

Lizzie was not going to let Jonathan attempt to say _"It's not safe."_

"It is safe now; granddad can't hurt me, you, or Sarah ever again."

A curious smile permeated on Jonathan's face, and he began to laugh.

"Like I'm going to believe it, unless you tell me that Alan is dead…"

A wicked smile spread across Lizzie's face

"Oh my god Lizzie is he dead?"

Jonathan intensely stared at Lizzie. It was now Lizzie's turn to laugh

"No he's not dead but thanks to Dinah and Bill granddad has nothing. No mansion, nothing that comes with the mansion, no car, no money…"

Lizzie could keep on going into a very long list of things that Alan did not have anymore. Jonathan looked over to Reva for some reassurance. Reva smiled too, as she shook her head.

"Yes it's all true Jonathan…" Reva responded and continued on "…he is currently leaving at the boarding house of company for free, because, well Buzz is not completely heartless."

"Jonathan I don't know what it is going to take to get you to believe me, but come on, do you think I would have been able to come here if granddad was still high and mighty. Before he lost everything, he knew practically every detail of your new life, and there was never a time when I was not being followed."

Lizzie felt a lot of pride is saying all these things. She was a bit upset when she learned what Bill and Dinah did, especially some anger when she learned of Dinah buying the mansion, but that anger soon subsided. For as much as she said she needed her family, she was just beginning to realize that being a Spaulding meant Alan's poison.

"Jonathan please say something?"

"You mentioned Dinah and Bill."

Jonathan was not a big Bill fan, but always liked Dinah

"Dinah took everything from granddad, she pretended to be "Philip", and picked up Alan's many secrets of "success", and then took the secrets and made her own success."

"Ok, but what does Bill have to do with all it?"

"You're not that dumb Jonathan, Bill and Dinah are siblings, and well Bill was able to get me out of Alan's prison."

"I don't think Bill has really realized what true love is till he met you Lizzie." Reva said.

Jonathan rolled his eyes, which did not go unnoticed by Lizzie.

"What the hell was that for?"

"Lizzie, watch the words in front of Sarah."

"Sorry, but why did roll your eyes, that was uncalled for."

"Uncalled for, Bill Lewis is not anything all that great."

"Yes he is, you don't even know him, plus how would you know anything about being great?"

A little bit of the old Lizzie appeared in her last statement, for is she were still the old Lizzie, she's be complaining about Jonathan's current lifestyle, but as much as she cared for both Jonathan and Bill, Bill did have things that Jonathan did not.

"Jonathan I'm sorry, that came out wrong."

"Sorry…"

Words like that just enraged Jonathan. He always knew that he'd never be able to compare to the Spaulding, Lewis, hell even the Cooper family, but he would do anything to make his life better for Sarah. Sarah was his guiding force of life, which he considered a great life. In fact Sarah was his only life.

"Sorry Lizzie you'll never change."

"Whoa Jonathan now you're out of line saying that." Reva spoke up.

"Lizzie has changed, yes she probably should not have said what she said, but she is changed more than you know."

Lizzie looked to Reva's direction with a thankful smile, but she could not stop a few tears from forming in her eyes.

"I'm really sorry about what I said, maybe I'm just jealous that you are giving Sarah a life that I can't even contribute too, but I'm not about to let you bash Bill. He loves me Jonathan, and he makes my life better everyday, he is the one person that keeps me sane whenever I get upset about you, Sarah, and Tammy."

Jonathan kept a straight face at the mention of his deceased wife's name. He could not let it deter him for the rest of his life.

"You can say all of those things Lizzie, but it's still not going to change my opinion of Bill, he is just using you."

Now Jonathan was the one saying the wrong thing, but Lizzie was not going to let it get to her.

"Using me, you wish he was using me, makes me wonder why you'd say something like that Jonathan; it makes me think you are jealous."

"Why would I have anything to be jealous about, why would I care that you're in love with someone new."

Lizzie was surprisingly quiet, as the words _"love with some new" _constantly repeated in her thoughts and brain.

"_He is jealous."_

Lizzie held Sarah a bit tighter like she was giving her hug, after a minute she loosened her hold.

"Hey Sarah you want to see grandma Reva?"

"Hey what did I say about calling me 'grandma'." Reva said jokingly, she loved both her grandchildren Sarah and Daisy.

Lizzie handed Sarah over to Reva

"Yeah there you go." Lizzie looked at Sarah one more time, and then looked at Jonathan.

"Well if you excuse me, I'll be back." Lizzie walked out of Jonathan's apartment.

"Whoa were is she going?" Reva asked a confused Jonathan.

"I don't know, probably getting something out of her car."

Jonathan patted Sarah's back as she sat in Reva's arms

"So, you're jealous of Bill ha?"

"No I'm not."

"Ok then, you're not jealous of Bill. You're jealous of the fact that and I quote 'Lizzie is in love with someone new'."

"I just said that to make Lizzie mad."

"Jonathan did she look mad too you, no; she's knows it, I know it, you're jealous, and it is ok to say that your are."

"No it's not."

Reva finally got Jonathan to admit it. There was not shame in Jonathan being jealous; he has history with Lizzie, plus a child with Lizzie. Not to mention the fact that he almost married her again, and lost out to Lizzie's new love. If Jonathan were to say he never had any feelings for Lizzie would be crazy, it would be like saying that herself did not still have feelings for Josh.

"See there you go, you--"

"Reva just drop it, what is taking Lizzie so long?"

Reva shrugged her shoulders, then focused her attention to Sarah as Jonathan peeked out his window to view Lizzie's car.

"Huh, Lizzie were are you?"

Lizzie's car was stood still but no Lizzie in sight. Jonathan went to the door opened it, and stuck his head out, still no Lizzie in sight.

"Lizzie… Reva Lizzie is now where in sight." Jonathan looked back at Reva as he spoke, and then watched as Sarah began to cry.

**Please leave a review, and get ready for chapter four: the accident mentioned in the summary of this story happens. It just sad that Lizzie don't get to be with Sarah, or Bill right now on the show, thankfully we have this site and can let our imaginations go wild. I had to mention Josh in here; well sometimes the Jeva saga is annoying (as they constantly look like Jeva will get back together) but I've never been a Josh/Cassie fan, and I hate the Reva/Jeffery pairing. Chapter four shall be up soon, thanks:**

**Logan-e.**


	4. connections

I don't want to disappoint you reviewers, but I'm not sure how I feel about this chapter, so those reviews (which are greatly appreciated) might inspire me to think otherwise, so here is chapter four enjoy!

Lizzie walked one way in the same direction. She did not really know where she was going, but really needed to think. Everything in her life was so confusing anymore; especially with Jonathan admitting that he was jealous of her relationship with Bill.

Now she did know why she walked away, but the reasons were all right there, right in front of her.

Lizzie continued on walking till she got towards the main part of town, and found a place with a bar, a place similar to that of Towers; she would fit in _perfectly._

The room was fairly crowded but spread out; Lizzie took a seat at the bar and immediately ordered herself a drink.

"Vodka martini please."

The bartender did as commanded and began making Lizzie's drink. Meanwhile a guy a few seats down took an interest in Lizzie. About five-ten in height, dirty blonde hair, well built, and cute. Lizzie knew when she was being watched. Lizzie looked too him for a moment to smile before taking her drink. She took a quick sip, she was going to look over again, but he made his way toward her.

"So I've never seen you in here before, new in town?"

"Um… kind of, sort of, not really. I'm just visiting a friend, and decided to go out for a drink, or just to have some fun!"

Lizzie really did want to go out and fun, but she just needed to think; Think away from Jonathan.

"Well you came to the right place, great place, plus I've been told I'm a pretty fun guy."

Lizzie put on a fake smile, and took a bigger sip of her drink.

"_That is the most sucky pick-up line I've ever heard."_

And before she knew it, the cute guy extended his arm for a greeting.

"Seth Aldrin."

"Lizzie Spaulding."

Lizzie and Seth shook hands, and then Seth just kind of paused like he was staring into his own world.

"_Great, he heard the name 'Spaulding', like that is going to do me any good out here, knew I should not have come here."_

"Everything ok?"

"Oh yeah, never really heard of anyone with the last name 'Spaulding', odd name; no offense."

"Oh. Trust me it does not offend me, but you can offend my grandfather all you like, the patriarch of the Spaulding family."

Seth looked a Lizzie a bit weird but then blew it off.

"Can I get a refill?" Seth asked the bartender.

"Yeah, same here."

Lizzie downed the last of her martini, maybe it would not be a bad night after all.

* * *

"So, where are we going exactly?" Seth and Lizzie where walking, Lizzie stood close to Seth as he held her close.

"Back to my place, but only if that is ok with you?"

Seth and Lizzie stopped walking, Lizzie looked up too him, but Seth could tell by the look on her face that her answer would be a **"no". **Lizzie could tell by the look on his face that he was disappointed, but she was not about to go home with someone she had only knew for like two hours, especially when she has a boyfriend waiting for her to come home.

"Look Seth I had a great time tonight, but I don't know, I just--"

"Lizzie what the hell is going on here?"

"Oh, hey Jonathan, you just called her Lizzie… wait you know Jonathan?"

"Yehhh, yeah, how do you know Jonathan?" Lizzie sputtered

"He is my neighbor."

Lizzie had only three martini's but she was not that out of it, she stepped away from Seth and looked at her surroundings, she was back at the apartments complex were Jonathan lived.

"How… I'm confused, what are doing with this guy Lizzie?" Jonathan asked a bit angered.

"Jonathan, wait a minute, I'm not just any guy. I have a name and f.y.i. we met at The Lounge at the Sunset Hotel…"

Jonathan sighed in relief. Even thought Seth was not familiar with Lizzie's family and its famous name, he knew Seth came from a rich corporate family just like Lizzie, and it would not have surprised him if Seth and Lizzie knew each other.

"I still want to know how you know Lizzie?"

Jonathan knew Seth was going to keep asking him questions, and Jonathan would not be so willing, but now that Seth had met Lizzie he would have to tell him sometime.

"She's Sarah's mom."

"Oh, ohhh, I'm just going to leave you guys, sorry Lizzie, sorry."

Seth quickly stalked off leaving Lizzie alone with an angry Jonathan.

"Jonathan…"

"Lizzie what the hell is your problem, I've been around town looking for you for the past two-and-a-half hours."

"I'm sorry; I just needed a little time by myself to think."

"Time by yourself Lizzie, don't you want to spend any of that time with Sarah?"

"Don't you ever question my intentions toward our daughter? I would drop everything in my life to have more time with her, to even have the time that was lost!"

"Would you drop Bill?"

Lizzie did not even hesitate to answer

"NO! OBVIOUSLY you did not here me before, he loves me!"

"You said you would drop everything, Bill has to be included, he's not worth it Lizzie!"

"There you go being jealous AGAIN Jona…than! Why won't you just admit, admit that you care about me." Tears began to stream through Lizzie's eyes.

"I thought a long time ago that I cared for you, YOU'RE THE MOTHER OF MY CHILD! But after everything you've done, I can never care for you."

"I'm not going to my pay for my mistakes for the rest of my life; my life is so good right now. I'm a better person, who is not trying to hold grudge. All's I want is to make things better with you, and take whatever time I can get with Sarah."

Jonathan did not know what to say; maybe he was holding a grudge.

"Liz—"

"Good-bye Jonathan, please hug Sarah for me." Lizzie sped past Jonathan running to her car, she was halfway inside when he finally spoke.

"Lizzie, where are you going, I thought YOU WANTED MORE TIME WITH SARAH!"

"Just because you say that, it's not going to make a difference, you'll let me see her, but once I'm gone you'll just run again, and I don't know if I can handle that."

"Lizzie sweetie, wait please!" Reva yelled

Reva had been standing on the balcony of Jonathan's apartment listening to the exchange between her son and Lizzie, and right now she would do anything to help Jonathan and Lizzie reconcile.

"I'll see you back in Springfield Reva."

Lizzie slammed her car door shut, the engine roared to life and she sped away.

"Jonathan, why did you let her go?"

* * *

Lizzie drove down the dark road with a death grip on the steering wheel, more tears streamed down her face. She did not want to live in the past anymore, but Jonathan always seemed to make things hard for her. His jealousy over her relationship with Bill. Lizzie cried even harder, she had flirted and had drinks with a complete stranger, almost went home with him, she could put it out all she wanted but it was like one step away from cheating. Though Lizzie had to reason though, for Bill was not all that faithful at times when Ava was in the picture, but it still hurt. Lizzie cried harder. She looked into her mirror, her eyes red and teary, with running mascara. One thing was still the same about her, she hated looking bad. Lizzie arched her head down, taking one hand off the wheel to wipe her tears away, but when she looked back up her eyes were blinded by a bright light. Then without much thinking time she was hit, a feeling like a jolt of thunder and lightning before her whole world went black.

**Please leave a review, and chapter five will be up soon. Please and thank you.**

**Logan-e**


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